ladieskissing | (no subject)

With a live show coming up in just a little over a month, rehearsals have begun in full swing. Some of the songs in this concert they've never performed on stage before, so Eli had had to create new dances for them. Now that they've all had time to commit them to memory, all nine of them have gathered up to do a run-through of the choreography. They're not worried about singing for now -- instead, they let the recording play in the background as they focus on the dancing alone. Eli watches all the way throughout, commenting on each girl's performance and pointing out unsatisfactory areas. ("Rin, don't swing your arm up that high!" "Nico, your turn is too slow!") Nozomi smiles a little to herself as she listens to her voice, even when Eli calls for her to stand up straighter, and not fall behind. Eli's very good at being authoritative.

They get through the group dances first, then move on to the units, and finally, pairs. The very last song on the list is Glass Garden, and Eli resigns from her position in the peanut gallery, and joins Nozomi in the center of the roof. Nozomi offers her a grin. From her spot near the CD player, Rin announces "Okay, ready!", and when they respond in kind, hits play.

They've practiced it well, Nozomi thinks. There's a bit of tension to the choreography, like a fear of coming too close for too long -- but then, it might very well be all in her imagination. Regardless, Eli is as graceful and poised as ever, and at the end of it, Nozomi feels they did a pretty good job.

Honoka applauds. The others, though, don't appear as enthusiastic.

"Mmm... somehow, it's a little..." Kotori begins, but doesn't quite have the heart to finish the sentence. Thankfully, Umi picks it back up for her: "Wrong! Totally wrong! It doesn't capture the feeling of the song at all!"

"Right?" Nico chimes in. "The choreography blew! Eli, you were stiff as a pole! A song like that's gotta have appeal, you know? It needs on-stage chemistry! Without it, there's no point at all!"

Nozomi looks to Eli with a sheepishly raised brow. Maybe it wasn't just her imagination, then.

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Eli brings her hands to her face before it contorts into an ugly sob.

Eli doesn't know how to respond to that question. She doesn't know what's wrong, or what's right, or what to do or think. She just hates what's happening, hates herself for not knowing what to do. Maybe also hates that Nozomi had to say anything and change everything.

As much as they try things will never go back.

Eli cries into her hands.

Nozomi winces at the sound, her smile dropping in an instant. She thought that this would be the right thing to do -- was even kissing her on the cheek too much?

Or, a small part of her dares to think before she stomps it down, is it that Eli wanted her to kiss her for real--

Of course not.

"Elichi..." She reaches out, softly tugging her hands away from her face. "I'm really sorry. I won't be selfish anymore. I won't say things like that again, so... you don't have to kiss me. You don't have to do anything you don't want to. Okay?"

Edited 2014-08-22 16:51 (UTC)

Eli's grip isn't so tight or her arms so stiff that Nozomi can't pull them away, but she hates that she'll see her like this. She's sure her face has to be red and splotchy, features twisted, nose running. Her head sags forward and she feels her forehead bump against Nozomi.

"I want to..." She's still sobbing, words still interrupted by hiccups. "I want to..."

She closes her mouth and swallows. This isn't the time to keep pushing something like that, not for her, or Nozomi. She wouldn't want Nozomi to kiss her when she's like this anyway.

She nods against Nozomi, doing her best to calm herself. "Okay."

"I'm really sorry," Nozomi repeats, smoothing one hand down Eli's back in hopes of quelling her sobs. She doesn't know what Eli's trying to say at the end of that sentence, and she decides it's best not to press her for it. Right now, all she wants is for Eli to stop crying.

"You're my best friend, Elichi."

Words of comfort, but they're genuine; no matter how different her feelings are, that's one thing that won't ever change. Eli is the one person most precious to her in the world, and staying by her side is so much more important than getting to kiss her would ever be. Nozomi always knew that -- she just let herself slip. It was a mistake she won't repeat.

Without letting go a second time, she asks in a cotton-soft voice: "Why don't we wash our faces and get ready to go home?"

With Nozomi's soft and gentle arms around her, her comforting hand on her back, Eli feels able to calm herself down.

She nods, finally, sniffling and hiccuping like a small child who's been crying for too long.

Her voice is cracked from strain. "I didn't do my cool-down exercises."

Nozomi nods dimly. They've already talked about this, haven't they? "You'll do them at home, right?"

Eli doesn't let herself start crying again, even though she feels like she could.

You'll do them. Not we.

She knows she was the one who first said that, but it still hurts.

She nods again. "Yeah."

Defeated, Eli pulls away from Nozomi softly, turning to the sink to wash her face.

Then she stops. The whole purpose of this conversation, this awful conversation that they're having, is for things to get back to normal. For the two of them to try to get all of that back.

Eli turns back to Nozomi, hopeful she'll say yes and afraid she'll say no. "Would you help me do them?"

Edited 2014-08-22 18:03 (UTC)

Nozomi's face brightens in an instant, grinning widely through her puffy eyes and red cheeks. "Yeah, of course!"

But then she hesitates, tapping a finger to her chin. "Ah, but should we go back to the rooftop now? It's getting dark already..."

Nozomi's smile and immediate confirmation makes Eli smile too, and she breathes out a lot of tension.

Which then picks back up at Nozomi saying it's getting dark out.

"We could try the gym? If there's a team practicing there we'll just take up a corner. Or a classroom?" She'd really rather not do them in the dark.

"I think a classroom would be fine," Nozomi says thoughtfully, nodding her head. Then a predatory grin edges onto her lips as she leans over Eli's shoulder, voice rising and falling like the moan of a ghost in a bad horror film. "Or would you rather walk all the way to the gym in the daaaark?"

Eli lets out a tiny squeak before she can even stop it. Her hands ball into fists in front of her. "Nozomi! You know I hate that!"

"Ooh..." Nozomi drops her voice to a slow, unnerving whisper. "What if you're doing back stretches, and your head's bowed down so you can't see, and then from behind--" her voice sharply rises-- "a ghost comes out and grabs you!" Shaping her hand like a claw, she punctuates that shriek with a rake of nails down Eli's back.

Eli's scream is piercing enough to be heard all across the school and she can't stop herself from clinging to Nozomi.

"NEVERMIND!! Let's just go home!"

Nozomi laughs, wrapping her arms around Eli in return. Everything feels so much more right already -- she hardly even hesitates before asking her next question. "Why don't you come over, and we'll stretch at my house?"

Eli is grateful to have Nozomi to hang onto, even though she's the cause of her current state. "Okay, okay, just don't scare me anymore!"

"Elichi!" Nozomi looks downright aghast at the accusation. "That wasn't me, it was the ghost!"

Eli pouts and is ready to continue scolding Nozomi, but then has a change of heart. It's okay to have fun, she reminds herself. Especially now.

"Then let's go before it returns to haunt me some more, okay?" She hangs onto Nozomi's arm. "You'll protect me, Nozomi?"

"Of course! With my spiritual power, no bad ghost would dare to approach us." Nozomi smiles, but somehow, it's more warm than teasing. She didn't get to wash her face yet, and it feels sticky and a little gross, but she doesn't want to let go of Eli. So instead, she quickly wipes her free hand over her face, and decides she'll wash it properly at home. "Ready to go?"

Eli smiles at Nozomi.

All of this and she still wants to be at her side. Still takes care of her and teases her. She really is amazing.

Not everything is fixed but, right now, they can be happy.

"Let's go."

"Ah, Elichi really is the cutest when she smiles."

Reaching down, she gives her hand a squeeze.

"Yeah, let's go!"